Wednesday, December 3, 2014

Being right where you are

I had to make breakfast because 2/4 of the kids had already told me about their rumbling bellies. Asher was walking around the house, hands behind his back like a boisterous professor, bleating out his favorite word in the history of all the words. "MA. MA. MA. MAMA. MAMA. MAAAA." Loud and insistent and overwhelming. (Can eardrums bleed? I fear we'll find out. And I know Asher loves me to itty bitty pieces and I love him right back, but I will be fine with the day that he loves me to itty bitty pieces at a lower volume.)

Elliot was trying to tell me a story, but kept getting drowned out by the little bleating goat in the house. I would uh-huh him every now and again and look in his general direction, but I wasn't really listening. He kept trying and would walk over to me and then walk back by the table and I just kept half-heartedly listening.

I do that sometimes. I am halfway there. I am in the room, making eye contact, there, but my mind is wandering.

And then I remembered that this was my six-year-old boy trying really hard to connect with his mama, in spite of a very loud and mama-obsessed toddler.

I put down the spoon and I walked past the baby and I sat on the couch with my adorable, dimpled little boy and I listened. All of me listened. His eyes lit up and his dimples flashed as he told me about this game he'd been playing with his cars.

It's not rocket science. It doesn't earn me any mother of the year awards. But it matters to a little boy. And it matters to me. It impacts our relationship today and the one I am so intent on growing throughout his childhood, adolescent, teen, and young adult years.

It was another reminder that these moments matter and I want to be in them. Because this is the easy stuff. All these kids who don't come the first time I tell them to wash their hands for breakfast. The ughing when I ask them to help fold their laundry. The how in the world did we lose another set of mittens. This is the easy stuff.

So I do my best to connect now, over the games they like to play and over the music they like to listen to and over the sports they like to watch. Because connections now help relationships later.

Maybe this is always easy for you. Sometimes it's easy for me and sometimes I forget and rush through everything. I need lots of reminders on being here. Just here. Not trying to do fourteen things at once. Just being here and breathing in the good of the moment.

I hope if your day is hard, you feel loved. I hope if your day is great, you have lots of people to celebrate with. I hope that you are able to be right where you are, enjoying some quiet moments, even if you have a toddler who loves to shout.

No comments:

Post a Comment