I held him on my lap, all 11 years and 364 days of him, all legs and elbows and excited grin. We looked at pictures of him through the years. I told him that I am equal parts flabbergasted, proud, amazed, and heartbroken that he will be 12 tomorrow. I told him that I love him and that I always, always will. I cried onto his t-shirt. I made sure he was the first to let go.